Teenage Blues
by Katherine2000
Summary: As teenage years catch Mikan , the first thing everybody notices is that she has changed and oh boy, she has no plans of ever going back. Watch her as she makes new friends and a new life. See her change into an wild, daring, impulsive and fun girl. Who said crazy people don't have fun?
1. Chapter 1

Natsume's POV

Mikan, has changed, that was the first thing I noticed when she didn't annoyingly scream and come running to hug the ice queen. She had let down her hair and was unusually quiet. That made me frown, Mikan is always just so 'Happy' that I never saw her like this; down, sad and ….. I didn't know so weird? The pastry girl and the one with the chemistry alice worrying over her and asked her about her, she simply just smiled and answered that she was fine. Well, this didn't convince me. This continued for the whole day.

Mikan's POV

I feel sad, lonely, as though no one can understand me. I guess Hotaru was surprised that I didn't run to hug her but I just couldn't muster up the enthusiasm which I usually do. Surprised huh? Well it is not an easy job to be a 'happy go lucky girl'. Sometimes even I need a break, and, judging how I feel I believe this break is going to be forever. Well I had to grow up someday and maybe this is this the right time. I was relieved when the last bell of the day rang and I just wanted to go to my room and sleep.

Then, everybody crowded. Crap! I don't want any kind of attention today. God! Is it so hard for a girl to pray for one day without any events concerning her? Yuu asked with a concerned expression, "Are you okay Mikan?" I just gave a bland smile and replied I was fine. Without waiting for any other probing questions from my class mates I moved walked away. I needed time to think and process whatever was going on in my head.

I reached my small room and just fell on my bed. I started crying. I don't know the reason and I don't care. It felt as if the whole world's burden was on me .I poured m heart out just so that… just so that I can be … me. Every day that I get up I have a choice to be either cheerfully happy and help others forgot their own problems or just be me… overcome my problems my way…. The reason I was this cheerful is to make others happy, but how long could I be doing this? In a way I hid myself behind the smiles, praying that one day my knight in shining armor could save me, guess what, this is reality and I guess I expected too much of this world. By the way, Who am I?

Me .I. Mikan. Dense. Stupid. Optimistic. Cheerful. Happy- These are the only words I can find for describing myself.

I am a girl who is optimistic. When life gives you such a bad hand you can only start hoping and praying that there is a rainbow behind this storm. But how long can you wait. I was crying today for this hopelessness for this waiting, it just gets so hard. I cried out my frustration, my anger, my…..optimism.

I knew that I can never be the same girl again, no; I can't be the girl who acts as if everything is alright because everything isn't. It hurts, when your best friend is so cold and unfeeling, when people dismiss your ideas thinking you are stupid, when everybody disregards you feelings just because you don't show what you actually feel. It just hurts…

I am going to change, for the better. I guess I knew when I put my mask on that one day it would come off.

* * *

><p>The song "The scientist" inspired these feelings in me. Mikan is undergoing her transition to her teenage self. That emotionally fragile time when we (teenagers) feel completely alone, tired and frustrated of our lives. The thing is how she, Mikan is going to take this. Natsume's POV is just to show the general point of view so please don't expect me to write on his perspective, except of course if any of you readers ask me to. Caio!<p> 


	2. Chapter 2

Saturday

Hotaru's POV

Sumire got up as soo as Mikan left the class and started in an annoyed tone," OK, guys we have to know what is wrong with Mikan. She hasn't talked, laughed, or even smiled. In fact she didn't even look at Hotaru. I want us to follow her this weekend and observe what she is doing and what is changing her." Seeing that none of her friends disagreed with her plan she sat down confidently. I looked at Natsume, he was looking outside and by judging the aura around him I guessed that he too was bothered with what was happening to her.

Hotaru's thoughts then wandered to a scene which took place few days back.

_Flashback_

"_Look Hotaru as much as I liked you I have changed. Don't take me wrong I still like you a lot but I can't be your best friend, maybe your good friend?"_

"_Why?" I asked her._

_She smiled sadly, "Will you accept me for who I am. The truth is maybe I am not this cheerful, not this optimistic, not this happy and certainly not this dumb. Will you Hotaru?" Her voice turned pointed by the end of her question._

"_I will."_

_She turned to me surprised and smiled gently, "Then maybe I was wrong, I don't deserve such a good friend"_

_I looked at her with sad eyes and she gasped seeing emotion in my eyes but I knew my face was still emotionless. We were standing in her room. She caught my hand and asked for some permission with her eyes. I nodded my head so she guided me to her window sill and we sat there._

_I looked at her, she was staring at the sunset and I suddenly knew she would grow up to be a stunner. "The truth is I never deserved you but Mikan I don't want to lose my best friend." She looked at me_

_And simply said," Then you won't lose me"_

"_Oh really" my tone was sarcastic as I said that and she just smiled and said "Really"._

_Guess what I believed her." So are you still my best friend?"_

"_As long as you want but Hotaru you won't be my first choice to talk to if I have a problem. Just to make things clear. I have another best friend and she will be joining soon. I would really like it if you both are also friends so I would like to invite you for dinner at Sunday at that new sushi place. What do you say?"_

_I was sad but there was no denying the truth and since I still at least wanted to be in her life so I said, "Ok."_

"_You are never going to change are you?" I could hear the smile in her voice and I replied, "Never"._

_I spent that night in her room simply talking and joking and I realized just as I hide myself she too did the same. For the first time I got to know her. Her favorite food was Italian, she loved playing the piano, she had many connections outside the school, she knew how to cook and that she had kind of a dark, hidden humor. She was witty. You had to listen carefully if you want to realize her jokes otherwise you won't even realize when she is making fun of you. She was fun, Mikan but she also had a dark side. I guess I had that coming, just because she smiled all the time didn't mean she was always happy. She told me about how she started a business outside the school and how well it was doing._

"_What business?" I asked._

"_I just brought an IT company. I fired everyone, hired new talented staff and now it is doing pretty well."_

"_What is its name?"_

"_Cross"_

"'_Bared to you ' inspiration"_

"_Maybe….." she said cheekily._

"_You have read that book", I asked with clear disbelief. _

"_Umm… Yeah. Why?"_

"_Don't you think you are too young to read such books?"_

"_Hey! I am 15 and well don't judge a book by its cover. I really am not as stupid as I act", I smiled because I actually couldn't believe that she was offended. _

"_So….Why did you act in front of everyone? In front of me?", I was curious but I was also hurt._

"_I guess it was easier to hide than everyone know the real you. When you left I really became a very different person and coming here gave me enough time to think. "She took a deep breath and said, "My grandfather died a few months back and allegedly he was wealthy so after his funeral his lawyer came to meet me, and he advised me to invest some of the money so I did."_

_I remembered that a day when she was called to the principal's office and she after she came she was pretty down but she put up her cheerful façade. I felt guilty because I knew she was sad but I was too busy with my new invention to go ask and console her. "I truly am sorry. You have my condolences."_

"_It's Ok I have moved on"_

"_So, who are your friends?'_

"_Well, I met them when you left. I became close friends with them but soon after that I came here I lost contact .When I was going to invest there was another company trying to buy it. Remember that few days when I was missing? I went for a meeting with the CEO just to find those two of my friends with him. Seeing that we all were friends and I was in school he let me have the company and offered to take care of it since was away. I have talked to them every day since I came here and t now we are pretty close . There are four of them-Christian, Levi, Damien and Katherine, my best friend"._

_When she said that I actually felt bad, seeing that she hugged me. "So, whose dad is taking care of your company?" I wanted to shift her attention away from me and she consented by continuing, "Katherine and Christian are siblings. "I noticed her cheeks flush a bit a when she said the guy's name. "Levi is Katherine's boyfriend but he, Christian and Damien are best friends. Christian has the blood bending alice, Levi has shape shifting, Damien has SEC, and Katherine has water alice"._

"_So, you know all of them and they are your best friends"_

"_Yes"_

"_I need to check them out, first"_

_Hearing that she started laughing,"Oh, Hotaru_

"_Well, it is my duty to warn them to better take care of you. After all you are my best friend"_

"_I hope we can hang out like this in the future, what do you say?"_

"_Anytime"_

"_What are your future plans since your company according to you is doing well", I asked, I really was curious._

"_It is now worth 3 million dollars and I am thinking of buying a casino, I do have many shay friends…. Hmm…."_

"_What? What do you mean 'shady friends'? "_

"_Well, it is business and I had to talk to them a lot. I met one of the mafia leaders when he wanted some software. Since he liked me a lot I got to befriend a lot of them"_

_I smiled; maybe it wasn't such a bad idea. "Can I meet them?"_

_She laughed quietly, "I knew you would ask that"_

_After that she showed me her new laptop and I talked to her 'shady friends' and since they heard I am a genius inventor many of them placed some orders which I made sure were not bombs or anything too terrorist related. I was careful they did not know the extent of my brain power and what I was capable of. She also told me of her new alice –SEC and how the High School Principal was her uncle and how her dad died. She recently met her Mom and they started making up for the lost years. I was surprised how much I didn't know and how much I missed in her life._

_Mikan saw me and said, "Hey, don't sweat it. It's okay and I don't mind-"I just hugged her and whispered my sorry._

"_Apology accepted. Now sleep, I don't want to see you sleeping at the class and I am sure if I don't sleep now I will be definitely late tomorrow for the class"_

_Like that our special night ended and I slept._

Present

Tring!

The bell rang and I moved out.


	3. Chapter 3

A day of revelations

Sumire's POV

"Ok, everybody here she comes!"

All people who assembled hid in their respective places.

Creak! The door opened and a confident well-clad Mikan strode out.

Ok… I didn't expect that, Mikan was dressed well, too well for my tastes. She wore a sap green woolen sweater over a blue and white checkered shirt with blue skinny jeans, light brown boots which reach till her knees with a matching beanie to partly cover her head . I turned to see Koko look at her, I frowned. Wait a minute, from where the hell did she get such clothes and when did she actually get a taste in fashion?I was thankful that Natsume was not there to watch her; I heard from my sources that he was least bothered about what is happening to her and that she, Mikan is just doing this to hog attention. I smirked, I didn't know her real intentions but what is wrong in investigating. The usually annoying girl had her hair down and judging by its length she was growing it. We all looked at each other silent communication passing between us and we started following her. Her first stop was the parlor. WE waited, and we waited and we waited! God! Who knew we spend so much time in the parlor. Finally!(God lord I love you!) Mikan emerged. Ok, this passed the limits. All the guys who came started drooling; I mean what is special about what she has done? I mean she only cut her hair into silky…..nice…looking layers (ugh!)and styled it. Right ? Sumire, don't get off track. Do not look at the hair and only concentrate on the mission. I saw Koko smirk at that. Ugh! I could feel my cheeks heating and I thought mentally, "This is the only time you are ever getting away for reading my mind. If it wasn't for this mission I would have scratched your face so bad, that you would be afraid to look at yourself in the mirror". Koko visibly paled and I felt a sense of triumph. We followed her until she entered the park. Just then Anna slipped; she stamped a twig, damn! I saw Mikan smile and move on as if nothing happened, what? She walked on until she met **them. They **looked really god. **They **consisted of tree hot looking guys and one hot girl. **They **got up and welcomed….. Mikan? What? Who does she think she is? Whatever, she does seem to know **them** well so she has to introduce me. Great, I will form a new fan club for them; well they do look as though they deserve t. Well there is a messy chocolate haired guy, one blond hunk and a good looking red head. The girl amongst them is a blonde. **They **are mine.

Mikan's POV

I turned around to find Christian looking at me with warm I eyes. I smiled , a true smile from the bottom of my heart and I just practically ran/walked into his arms. His arms felt so good around me and I breathed his scent in.

*Cough* *Cough*

Shit! I felt color rise to my cheeks. And I turned to find my gorgeous best friend hiding her laugh and stretching her arms to indicate she wanted to hug me. I smiled cheekily as I went to hug her too.

Levi said, "Hey! Aren't you forgetting us! I then went and hugged Damien and Levi. Wow! I guess today is a hug day. We all sat down and started talking.

Sumire's POV

I saw the most dazzling people I've ever seen meet. I was simply star struck. All the three guys were tall and lean, the two girls just looked plain gorgeous. Mikan fit perfectly with them. I realized, she too was lovely and the people around her did nothing to diminish her appearance, however good they looked. She was looking striking with them and I felt snake-like envy wrap around me. I reminded myself that…. Mikan was actually my friend. I heard sudden peals of laughter. I turned to their direction to find them laughing and chatting like they have been doing it for years. The end of the day I could only come to this conclusion. They were like a family, so happy, so together, so…. I couldn't explain it in words. Something about them was compelling, fascinating. Strangely, I knew Koko was thinking the same. Before I left, I looked up to see a particular some one sitting on a tree above them. Natsume, was frowning.

Mikan's POV

It was good to be back again. As we walked back to our dorms I reminded them of our dinner. It was specially arranged with the permission of the principal and I my friends really wanted to meet Hotaru. Everybody agreed to meet up after an hour at the same spot i.e., in front of our dorms.

"Hey, Sakura, wait up", I heard Kate call me.

As soon as we entered the room Kate cornered me, I knew this was going to happen. *sigh*

"Ok, so what is troubling you?" It was no use trying to escape Kate and she happened to be my best friend so I answered her truthfully.

"I feel guilty. I mean every time I look at their faces I see them expecting me to change back to this …. I don't know, back to my old 'I am happy all the time' self. You saw them tailing me today."

She looked at me with a piercing stare, " So you feel guilty…" she added a dramatic pause," because you are not satisfying their expectations. Because they want someone who is always cheerful, dense, stupid and optimistic who, by the way, covers all her sadness, loneliness and insecurity behind smiles. You feel guilty because they," an emphasis on the last word," don't want the real you."

Hearing her talk ,all of my worries seemed so petty.

"Well , if you put it like that it doesn't make sense."

She caught my hand and pulled me to the bed. She looked and asked," Is it such a big crime being ourselves and enjoying our life. I mean you cannot become something according to someone else's whims and fancies. You have your own life and, you have the right to enjoy it and decide how you want to live it."

I still felt guilty, what she said absolutely made sense but…

Looking at me she guessed my dilemma ," You feel as though you have betrayed , in a way truthfully you did. I mean you practically play acted the whole year as someone who you really aren't. In fact, now you are doing a good thing by being who you really are , they do deserve to see the real you ,after all the acting you made them see. You do deserve an Emmy. Also you are not obliged to only talk with us, you know we are you family."

I had to smile," Damn, Katherine Paige, you run your magic again."

From nowhere we both looked at the clock. We wasted fifteen minutes. In a race with time we changed in record time and started doing each other's hair. I wore a LBD with spaghetti straps while she wore a red tube. We both wore our heels and dashed towards our meeting point.

Hotaru's Pov

I reached the restaurant to find all of them already comfortable and at ease with their surroundings. As they acknowledged my approach we greeted each other and took our seats. I wore an amethyst dress which I am sure matched my eyes and was quite satisfied with my appearance. When you have a problem,you immediately start tackling it. Star with the easiest and in the way you star finding answers for the hard ones. My view of life was relatively simple.

They all were well mannered and we stared talking. We started to talk about my work and to my amazement everybody including Mikan were able to catch up to what I was saying, ask questions and give suggestions. We then talked about general likes and dislikes and we stared to banter. This was the first time I was like that, talking and enjoying. Maybe it is the atmosphere or their wit or my nervousness which made me relax and enjoy the night, either way I was not complaining. When it was late the waiter informed us of our time, our school being the next day and we all took our leave. All my worry about Mikan vanished by the end of our dinner, she was in good hands but yeah, no doubt I will miss her.

Mikan's POV

As we reach the dorms everybody left except for Christian and me. We had this peculiar awareness to each other's thoughts and feelings. When the last person I turned to him.

He was the first person to break our silence," How are you?" I was faced with piercing cerulean eyes. I was mesmerized by their stare," I am fine- physically, yes; emotionally, I need Kate's wise words to sink into my head."

He smiled, "She usually does make a lot of sense doesn't she, though we might have to put her antics aside"

I snorted," Ask me about it."

All of a sudden I felt shy. I glanced at his handsome profile. His face could make priests sing in praise. His straight messy locks were just reaching his shoulders. His eyes had a twinkle which gave him a bad boy look, truly, he could be so cold… We stared as the moon and it started getting cold. We had to leave. We looked at each other and wished each other a good night.

He stared walking away just after he whispered something in my ear, I blushed.

Christian rarely showed his feelings, always so stoic but he did convey what he wanted to those he loved. That night till sleep took me completely only his words were echoing in my head.

"_I missed you."_


End file.
